Tegami
by Deathberry Love
Summary: This is how she'll tell him. Before she can't; before she dies. IchiRuki


**Summary:** This is a IchigoxRukia Fic so read if you are a shipper of them xD It's probably going to be a sad-ish story between them. Rukia would never say her hidden feelings (whatever they may be) directly to anybody…so she finds a different way just at the right time.

**Author's Note: ** I've been planning to write a IxR Fic for a long time but I just never dared to xD so please be nice – light flamers, light praise and suggestions for better work is very much accepted so please review(:

**Disclaimer:** Kubo Tite wouldn't really be writing in English on a website, would he?

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"…was a beloved husband, brother and of course an honorable captain as one of the members of the Gotei Thirteen. He will remain in our hearts of course, also as a spectacular head of the Kuchiki clan and an irreplaceable member of the Kuchiki family. All gathered here, will pray for his soul to rest in peace and his body here to be remained unharmed…"

Carnations after carnations were put down in front of a gravestone bearing "Here lies Kuchiki Byakuya. Lost his life in a most noble way on battlefield," with more inscriptions underneath.

A considerably short shinigami with short hair that lead into jagged and splitted ends, companied by a tall, broad red-headed man, both covered in black cloths slowly shuffled forwards and laid down two carnations each.

"Nii-nii…Nii-sama," she whispered weakly as tears slid from her dark, violet eyes.

"Rukia," prompted Renji. "C'mon," he slowly guided her away, letting the next people in line to pay their respects.

"Nii-sama," she repeated over and over again as Renji gently pushed her along.

He had died…one of the strongest…

-----------------…--------------------

"Kurosaki! Where are you looking at?!" a gleaming blue arrow shot right past the tall orange-haired teenager, missing him by inches.

"Watch it Ishida!" he growled in annoyance.

"Stop daydreaming! We're supposed to be training!" Ishida chided.

Besides the two battling and gibbering idiots, Chad (who was sitting in silence, watching the other two) was also in the vast basement of the Urahara shop – training themselves hard, for the another upcoming battle that would take place in none other than Hueco Mondo.

"Take a break Ishida. We've been at this for the whole morning and it's getting nowhere," Ichigo immediately jumped off the rock he was standing on and landed beside Chad.

"No kidding, you've lost focus for the past few days," Ishida muttered darkly, but seated himself on the flat piece of land as well.

"Kurosaki-kun! Kurosaki-kun!" the high-pitched voice of Orihime Inoue reached the three. They saw her figure running down the long steps and beckoned her over. She seemed excited and breathless when she reached them.

"Inoue? What's going on?" asked Ichigo.

"Good news," she smiled happily.

"They've found Rukia?" said Ichigo, standing up at once, looking at Orihime hopefully.

Silence greeted him back.

"I umm…don't think so," she said tentatively after a while, when his smile dropped.

"Right." Was Ichigo's reply. He slumped back down to the floor.

How would they have found Rukia? He was stupid to think so. Ever since the second day after Byakuya's funeral, she had been missing. Whether in the real world or Seireitei, nobody knew. There was no trace of her reiatsu or any mark she'd left behind.

According to Ukitake, she was probably still feeling extremely guilty about Byakuya's death.

Ichigo could still remember the details of it all.

While the group were in Hueco Mondo, rescuing Orihime, Byakuya, intent to keep his promise to Hisana and keep Rukia safe, did some research on Hueco Mondo and kept re-reading and checking the latest reports about hints on Aizen's whereabouts. He immediately then figured out that the "Hueco Mondo" that Ichigo and the others were wandering about in was an illusion. Aizen was hiding in a completely different place, though he didn't know Orihime's location. It was a fake Hueco Mondo that Ichigo and the group were touring. So in his haste, without telling in person to Yamamato or anybody else he had rushed to the fake Hueco Mondo, and with the help of his skills found them at once. He told them of his findings but they continued to look for Orihime there.

He decided to stay. Because of his promise to his late wife.

And that's why when they finally found Orihime – not to mention the many Arrancars and Vasto Lordes that was guarding her. His decision to stay made the biggest difference ever. If he had gone back, they would've never overcome that many of Aizen's minions. But he was the sacrifice. And just when they were about to get their butts out of the illusional Hueco Mondo, he didn't make it.

"Uh…Inoue-san what_ is_ the good news then if it's not that?" prompted Ishida, breaking the long silence that was whilst Ichigo was remembering the reason Byakuya died.

She brightened immediately. "Renji-kun has been promoted! He's now officially the captain of 6th Squad!"

"Renji?!" Ichigo choked, coming out of his why-Byakuya-perished-and-lets-feel-grief-over-it-stupor. "Like hell! How did that guy get to be a captain?! I can list around three hundred reasons – "

"Three hundred reasons why I couldn't have possibly become captain? Do tell Ichigo," came the deep, rough growl of a voice.

Ichigo looked upwards.

And nearly died laughing.

It was Renji. In shinigami robes. Plus an undoubtedly new, captain's cloak. Except, unlike Byakuya's which was neat and tidy, it looked like Renji had gotten drunk with a pair of extremely razor sharp scissors the night he got the cloak.

The ends were cut unevenly so it kind of resembled Kenpachi's but on the left side he had made the hole in a sleeve even bigger and cut unevenly there as well. It looked distorted.

"Renji if you don't know how to sew or do needlework properly you could've given the thing to me and I'd have let my little sister or better, Ishida handle it. What the hell have you done to that poor piece of cloth?"

"Hmph. It's called having personality,"

Ichigo sniggered, accompanied by Ishida who was trying not to. "What? So eager to have your own signature cloak?"

Renji glared at them. "I've got orders and news to bring."

By now, Ichigo was rolling on the floor laughing, Ishida was covering his mouth but was obviously still sniggering, Chad was looking at them all blankly, as did Orihime who was looking around, clueless.

"You've brought enough news Renji. You've brought enough!" spluttered Ichigo as he clutched his sides.

"What fools. Renji I told you to take it off before you see them,"

Ichigo stopped at once. So did Ishida. They all swiveled their heads to try and see who the person was. But Ichigo didn't need to look. The voice belonged unmistakably to –

"Rukia."

"Do you call rolling around on the ground, laughing so much until you look like a fish out of air, training?"

Her arms as usual, were crossed and she was talking with the same strong commanding voice. Ichigo couldn't believe at once that this was the Rukia who was silent and crying for days on end after the funeral-until she went missing.

"Like you've been training a lot," shot back Ichigo but he was grinning.

"Kuchiki-san!" cried Orihime who stood up and immediately went over to hug her. When she released Rukia, Ichigo couldn't help but notice that tears were welling up in Rukia's eyes. But those were quickly swiped away in one swift movement.

She walked up to Ichigo, hands on hips and looked down at him.  
"For your information I _have _been training for the past few days – SERIOUS training…unlike some people,"

"Tch," Ichigo scoffed and stood up – and the advantage levels changed instantly. "What – bawl your eyes out?"

That earned him a whack on the head – the advantage levels changed once again.

"Oww – you dumbass!"

"Rukia! We're running out of time!" Renji pulled her away before she could give Ichigo another bash.

Ichigo arched an eyebrow. "So proper all of a sudden Renji. You're getting out of character,"

He sighed then sucked in a deep breath. "We're heading out tomorrow. I know it's late notice…but all the assigned shinigami squads are going to Hueco Mondo tomorrow. Ukitake taichou has done research for the whole of the past few days. He's certain he's found the true Hueco Mondo,"

Ichigo, Ishida, Chad and Orihime all gasped.

"Uso…" gaped Ishida.

"So soon? But we haven't even had enough preparation. I thought it was battle in the _winter_," pointed out Ichigo.

"It's still autumn," put in Chad in his deep voice.

Renji scratched the back of his head. "Apparently Aizen's developing of the King's Key is going a lot faster than expected. They found out that the level and depth of Aizen's research during his stay in Sereitei was a whole lot more than we had thought. Yamamato-Taichou decided it,"

"But tomorrow is too soon!" cried out Orihime. "I haven't even spent time with Tatsuki-chan! Or my other classmates! I need to say goodbye! You never know…you never know if you don't make it back!" Since she was already crying at Rukia's arrival, her tears were now falling in bucketfuls, splattering the brown earth beneath them.

Everyone was silent for a few moments, as the prospect of death drifted into their minds, triggered by Orihime's sudden emotional outburst, until Rukia slipped her arm around Orihime and gave her a little squeeze.

"You're going to be back Inoue. We all are. Nobody's going to be left behind," She wheeled Orihime to her, face to face. "We're all going to make it back.

I promise you."

At her words, Ichigo felt relieved – the old Rukia was back and that already settled the majority of problems he had.

"Yeah," he agreed. "We're all going to be back here. There will be injuries, but we'll all be back safely,"

Ishida nodded, Renji grunted and smirked and Chad, like Ishida gave a strong nod of his head.

They'd return back to this place – the basement of the Urahara Shop, no one would be left behind.

It was a promise – between the six nakama.

---------------…-------------------

"Oi, Rukia what are you doing at my desk?" Ichigo padded into his room, drying off his hair with a towel, then settling around the towel around his neck he walked up to Rukia who was hunching over small desk, scribbling something frantically on pieces of paper. She seemed so concentrated that she didn't bother replying him, nor did he think that she had heard him at all.

Only did she realize he was in his bedroom again was when she could see his shadow looming over her. Before he could decipher what she was writing, she had hastily – and clumsily covered herself protectively over pages that were filled with blue ink. He had only seen images of messy characters.

"Meh. You write like Karin. Can't a read a word of what she has,"

"I'm not used to these…_pens_…or watchama' call its. I wonder why you humans stopped using brushes, they are so much easier to write with.

"Says you," muttered Ichigo, flinging himself on his bed and covering his eyes with the damp towel. "What you' writing anyway?"

"None of your business!" she snapped – too quickly.

He lifted the towel slightly. Her cheeks were a shade of flaming red that he had never seen. She was clutching the paper like it was her lifeline and she had an embarrassed look on her face.

He arched his eyebrows. "What's with you? You're so…jumpy…"

She shook her head, regaining her cool. "Fool. What reason is there for me to be, as you say, jumpy?"

Ichigo narrowed his eyes further, but her deep violet eyes were so clouded over that he could never read what was behind it. He closed his eyes and thwacked the towel over his eyes again. "Nothing,"

"Ichigo…"

"Hn?"

"Tomorrow's too early…"

"What?" he sat up, the towel drifting off his face.

"I mean…there's still so many things that I want to do! So many things I'm expecting to happen! It's just – "she calmed down. "it's just…nevermind,"

"Wait Rukia. What? Tell me." He grabbed her arm. "Rukia, seriously. What the hell is wrong with you?"

True, he was almost _happy _ that she was once again, an inhabitant of his bedroom. But she looked tense and shaken up ever since she had left Urahara's and this wouldn't be something to classify as making him happy.

She pried his hand off her arm. "Nothing," she said grandly. "I'm going to sleep." Night Ichigo." And with that, she bounded off the chair, slid open the cupboard door, climbed in and slammed it shut. The silence echoed into Ichigo's ear.

"Oi! Rukia!" he was about to stride over and bang on the cupboard door when - .

"Mm," came a deep voice from outside his room, and to Ichigo's utter disbelief, his father, Kurosaki Isshin stepped into his room. "That girl needs chocolate. Lots of chocolate. To take her mind off things. Ichigo I know you're sixteen now but you've seriously got to learn how to wait. There's no use in rushing sex with the girl if she doesn't even want it. I'm surprised she didn't slap you,"

Ichigo was paralyzed. Before he could at least attempt to get a sound from his mouth his father continued, "BUT if she does change her mind and you two know you're ready, I always have these – "he proceeded to take something from his black trousers pocket when Ichigo realized all to well the familiar packaging that he'd see at the shelves below the cashiers of 7 11s.

"Get out! Go to hell! Never let me see those again! Burn them! Get out!!!" he kicked Isshin out before he could react. He slammed the door, the little "15" door decoration clattering noisily against it.

Ichigo was flaming red.

How could he? How could he?!! Bring condoms into his room and suggest that he and Rukia was…_was._

"Ichigo! Rukia-chan! I'll always be here for YOOOUUUUU!" his father's voice echoed off into the distance as Karin, undoubtedly, sick off the commotion, came out of her room and kicked him down the stairs.

Ichigo huffed and returned to his bed. He wasn't even going to bother with Rukia. If she was acting all mood-swing she could do so – he'd ignore her totally,

until he heard muffled laughter coming from inside the closet.

Pissed, annoyed and extremely confused, he marched over to the closet and in one violent motion, flung the door aside. Rukia, fitting, just, into the closet was rolling around clutching her sides, overcome with fits of laughter.

"Just _what _the hell is up with you?!" he glared at her.

"Your dad…" she choked out in between laughter. "Your dad…has – has an insane imagination,"  
Ichigo twitched his eyebrows in aggravation, his arm leaning against the small frame of the cupboard door. "Yes,_ I_ _know that. _I've been living with this nutcase for sixteen years,"

"Yeah – yeah…but still!" and she collapsed back onto the mattress with a new wave of deep but ringing laughter.

"Well good. You're happy now? No more depression over tomorrow?"

That immediately shut her up – even if it wasn't meant to.

"I never said I was scared of tomorrow," she said quietly, her head bowed, her hair shadowing her eyes.

Ichigo sighed in exasperation. "You didn't have to. It's written all over your face. Rukia, you were the one who said all that "we're gonna' come back" speech to Inoue. So why are YOU fearing death so much now that you can't even hide it?"

"I do not fear death," she said with the same resolute and low voice.

He rolled his eyes. "Yeah right. Rukia, you're beginning to really suck at covering up your feelings."

She instantly looked up, worried. "I am? You-you can see that I…I"

Ichigo reached out a hand and cupped her cheek. She flamed up instantly and her breath caught in her throat. This was…this was…

Until he moved and directed her heads to all four directions, rolled his eyes back and said with a bored voice, "Yes Rukia, I can see it all. Right now you're thinking – "Oh damn. What am I gonna' do tomorrow? I suck. But I can't let Ichigo know that I need him to save my sorry ass," yes don't deny it Rukia, that's what you're thinking," he concluded with a deadpan, solemn voice.

Rukia slapped his hand away, but she was grinning back. "Please Ichigo, promise me you'll never take psychology,"

"Oh yeah?" Ichigo withdrew his hand and rubbed it where it had reddened from her slap. "Since when did you learn the term "psychology"? Shouldn't be meddling with big words Rukia, especially modern ones,"

She scoffed. "I do my homework,"

"Oh sure. Whadya' do, draw your little Chappies with speech bubbles and haves theses long vocabulary inside the bubbles?"

That earned him a punch in the face.

Rukia landed on her feet on the carpet, Ichigo, stumbling back onto his bed, holding his nose.

"Although," she chortled. "That _is _a good idea. Ichigo, write me up a long vocab list, I've got some drawing to do and you've got some teaching to do tonight,"

It was one long-ass night.

As her head nodded off into her sleep, over the desk, the crumpled papers, Ichigo noticed, were tucked inside her (Yuzu's) checked pajamas.

For something to be kept so close, it showed that it was something truly important.

**Author's Note: ** So there's the first chapter! Hope you enjoyed it. I know the Byakuya and "illusional" Hueco Mondo part was a bit weird but please bear with it – I wanted Rukia to be slightly more vulnerable at the beginning xD

Now just press that little button down there(:


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